A hard days night..

"It's been a hard day's night, and I've been workin' like a dog." I don't know why that song is stuck in my head, but it is. For the last few days I have found myself singing it in my head. Probably just life catching up with me, and the way my addled brain deals with it. Nothing remarkable has happened in either direction. Just still plugging along. He had a couple of good days in physical therapy last week. The last few days he has done alot more sleeping. They have changed some of his medications again, we hope he is more alert next week. He looks great. He really does. He seems more relaxed. He has not chosen to speak to me but I have heard from others that he has had some more word responses. This is all good. We read some more today, I think we are on our 7th book now since this adventure began. I decided to change things up a bit this time and give the murder, mayhem and mystery a break. We are reading "Geek Love" a book that was given to me. A little bit strange, but he doesn't seem to mind. We had a quiet afternoon, just the two of us. We kept the lights off, letting the sun stream through the window, and enjoyed the cool air conditioning while we read. It wasn't a particularly taxing day or weekend, but I am tired. Tired to my bones today. No sleepy, just tired. The girls and I came home early enough to get a bath in before bed, and they went to bed with little trouble. The week starts again in the morning....breakfast, processing orders, off to school, go to the post office,go to the gym (trying to get that triathlon practice in!), pick up from school, swimming lessons, back home, dinner, bed....a long day. Another long day. And I'm tired. It's been a hard day's night....and I should be sleepin' like a log...

The Triathlon and his first Triathlons...

First I want to repost some information about the triathlon as we are now just a week away. It is in Mt Shasta and everyone is welcome at Camp Eric participants or not. We will meet there for the triathlon and then move the camp to the Burreson's (we love you C & H!) home for a BBQ. I would like to say to all of the people who are able to join us, please, please, please, give a shout out to the Rotary Club when you are there. They went out of their way to support us, and make it easier for us all to be able to participate. They welcomed us and embraced us and we appreciate it so much. In addition to that they also have thrown out an additional welcome to all Law Enforcement. Any Law Enforcement that wishes to join the triathlon this week, they have offered to waive the fees. They want everyone to be able to participate who would like to. I know that they sent out a letter to the local law enforcement agencies and that Shasta County SO has three members who are going to participate, and they don't even know Eric. I also heard that another team from Butte County SO has also jumped in to participate. Thank you so much. Much like the BBQ the SO just had, it is a wonderful opportunity for our girls to see the kind of support they have. It is so important for them right now as they miss him so much. It makes them feel so safe and protected to see all of these people who care so much for their daddy. I appreciate it so much. They are and always have been his number one priority and I try each day to make it safe and secure for them. Thank you for honoring him.

A bit of a re-post about the Triathlon:
You can download the entry form from the Rotary website (www.dunsmuirrotary.org) and fill it out ahead of time. PLEASE let Kelly (or leave a comment here) know if you are putting a team together so we can compile a master list of our “Friends of Eric Teams”. We are asking that all teams use the name Friends of Eric #. It will help if K know you are registering so K can keep track of what number each team is assigned. She will also need to know how many ERIC Triathlon shirts and what size is needed for each team. This is not the event shirt included with the Tinman registration but one created just for our “Friends of Eric” Participants. She will have them available at the carb loading dinner and the day of the event for $15. *Please also note that if you are unable to make it to the triathlon but would still like a "Friends of Eric" t-shirt, please contact Kelly at skmora@netzero.com and let her know how many and what sizes so she can get them for you. Thanks Scott for the one of a kind art work! With each day we get more excited about the event. The organizers have been very supportive of our group and are excited to share in the celebration of Eric and his strength and will to recover. Anyone entering the Triathlon, Please call Kelly Mora @ (530)824-1111 or e-mail skmora@netzero.com with your team details.

The story of his first two triathlons...I feel it is only fair to tell you this, as I do not want anyone to think he is some well oiled triathlon machine, or that you have to be to particpate. It has never been about that for him. It is the "doing" he has never been afraid of failing, he just wants to get out there and do his best. That is all we are doing, celebrating his attitude and letting him know that we all support him and the road he has to travel.

The first triathlon he was ever in was the City of Gold in Oroville. I had actually forgotten about it until I was reminded of the details at the BBQ. He had decided to give it a go (and no he had not been "training", just decided to go for it), and signed up.
He had worked an overtime shift the day before the triathlon, and as he was on his way home that night, had been called to another case. He got home very late with very little time to sleep. He set his alarm but slept through the first part of it. When it finally woke him, he jumped out of bed, threw on the nearest clothes and went to the event. He got there and started almost a full hour late. This is how it was described to me by a friend who was expecting to do the triathlon with him "We all got finished and were just sitting there hanging out, getting ready to pack up, when we heard an announcement. "And here comes the last particpant, who got here an hour late......Eric Christopher" We looked up shocked to see him. We thought he did not come, and there he comes running over the finish line in some bright shorts, and a ripped tank top. He had a great big grin on his face and his hands raised up in the air." He finished dead last, but he finished.

The second triathlon, was the Whiskeytown Ironman. We had to go up the night before so we decided to camp with friends. Of course he was working until later than he thought and we didn't get there until late. It was dark and we had to carry our gear down a path to the campsite and set up camp in the dark. He laughed as he put up the tent by the beam of his headlight and said that he would not know how to put it up in daylight as he had never done it. He started the triathlon with everyone else, first the swim, and then the bike. We saw him leave on his borrowed bike, but as everyone else came in....no Eric. The others were finishing the run. We waited and waited, and finally we saw him. Even from a distance you could tell something was wrong. When he got in we could see the front tire on his bike was badly bent. The bike portion was off-road and he had borrowed a bike from a friend's wife for the day. He had gone off an incline and landed badly mangling the front tire. He had picked it up and carried it on his shoulder running for about a mile, then decided it would take forever to get back that way, so he laid the bike on the ground and jumped up and down on the rim until it was straight enough to pass through the fork. He rode it the rest of the way back. He got back to base and left for the run, and again finished dead last. But he finished.

He has always been about the journey, experience, just "doing it". Whatever it takes to make it to the end. It doesn't matter where you place, just as long as you can say you didn't give up and you finished. Thank you all for joining us on this journey, helping us support him now on his way to the finish line. It doesn't matter if he finishes dead last, just as long as he finishes. That is really all that matters...

A beautiful day in the park....

We had a beautiful day in the park today. There was a BBQ, music, people laughing and enjoying a good meal. There were carefree children (mine included) racing around the grass, collecting feathers and other small treasures. Family and friends were in abudance. It was a like a large family reunion, the kind where you feel at home, and the hours pass quickly and you share stories and rememberances. The kind where there are so many people that you know, you go away feeling like you just didn't get a chance to visit with all of them. A beautiful day in the park. Of course there was one important person missing. The one that I often hear laughing in the distance, or can spot across a crowded room as he usually has an audience around him for one of his stories. While I could not see him there, except in the wonderful aray of photos spread across the tables, I could feel him. I could feel his warmth in all of the people that I saw. I felt his joy, and his life in all of the people and the stories about him that were relayed to me. The girls felt safe and free to run and play in the presence of all these people who care so much for their daddy, so much for them. They were very happy to be able to go to "the get well party" for their daddy. I appreciate everything. The shirts, the food, the dontations, the auction, the people, the support, but most of all I appreciate the gift of the day. The sharing of of yourselves with us. The sharing of him with us. I am not a person who does well in crowds, a bit of a hermit I am told. You all made it easy for me. I appreciate that. The quiet support, thank you for all of the familiar faces. Thank you to those that I did not know, for introducing yourselves. Their was so much care and attention in the details, we really felt it all. The pictures. The flowers, the guest book, the copy of this blog. It was .............a beautiful day in the park. Thank you.

Auction Info..

I have had so many people want to know what is going to be at the auction. Susan was nice enough to transfer the list to a format that I could post here. Thank you so much to everyone who has donated these wonderful items. I think everyone will agree it is truely amazing!
Eric Christopher FundraiserDonations

Item#
Item Description
1
Helicopter Ride - 1 1/2 hr scenic tour of Butte County for up to three passengers - Scott is a commercial rated pilot. Pilot for 8 years. "Take-off" airport to be arranged within Butte County. (Value: $800)
2
Tuscan Ridge 18 holes for 2 with a cart & 4 sleeves Titleist golf balls (Value: $95)
3
1 week stay in Villa in Costa Rica (does not include meals or airfare) ($950 value)
4
Set of 2 cup & saucer USSR china (Value: $60)
5
Set of 2 cup & saucer Lenox china (Value: $60)
6
Set of 8 cups and saucers, sugar & creamer - Bavaria Germany (Value: $200)
7
4 antique green glass parfait dishes (Value: $40)
8
Road trip cooler w/games and snacks & Tonka Truck (Value: $40)
9
Prayer bead bracelet (Value: $20)
10
Gold/green enamel dragonfly earrings (Value: $20)
11
Gift certificates to Black Bear Diner (Value $20)
12
Gift certificates to Black Bear Diner (Value $20)
13
Gift certificates to Black Bear Diner (Value $20)
14
Gift certificates to Black Bear Diner (Value $20)
15
A Top Driver School--teenage driver course (Value: $380)
16
Amethyst/Hematite Hessonite Garnet/Rubellite Garnet Kyanite 24k & 14k earrings (Value: $350)
17
Teac Brand i-Pod/CD Video to TV deck player (Value: $150)
18
2 hand cut black walnut bowls (Value: $25)
19
2 hand cut black walnut bowls (Value: $25)
20
1 hand cut black walnut bowls (Value: $10)
23
10 oz solid silver bar (Value: $150)
24
Framed Oil Painting: Tree (Value: $50)
25
Framed Oil Painting: Lake Scene (Value: $50)
26
Jin Shin Do Acupressure Treatment (1 1/2 hr session) by Mary or Maggie (Value: $50)
28
Taqueria Marias Gift Certificate (Value: $20)
29
Taqueria Marias Gift Certificate (Value: $20)
30
Taqueria Marias Gift Certificate (Value: $10)
31
Hair cut and Style at 2110 in Oroville (Value: $20)
32
3 Chico Outlaw Baseball Tickets Aug. 28, 2009 (Value: $35)
33
5 handmade soaps in a basket (Value: $30)
34
Matted 12x24" print "Fisherman w/Trout" (Value: $50)
35
Matted 12x24" print "Bait Shop" (Value: $50)
36
Refurbished antique scale (Value: $150)
37
Antique replica fire engine & Antique replica police car and teddy bear policeman (Value: $50)
38
Tiffany & Co Bracelet black beads w/silver (Value: $75)
39
Tiffany & Co silver book mark (Value: $75)
40
Crystal pin of angel (Value: $25)
41
Large silver crown pin with amethyst stone and silver crown pierced earrings (Value: $75)
42
Crystal Butterfly white and pink pin & pink post earrings (Value: $40)
43
Gift Basket: hair products, candles $100 gift card for Last Tangle Hair Salon, Chico (Value: $150)
45
4 sleeves Titleist Golf Balls (Value: $20)
47
Hat + 3 fishing lures (Value: $40)
48
3 fishing lures (Value: $25)
49
4 fishing lures (Value: $35)
56
Lake Oroville Floating Campsite (Value: $45)
57A
Handmade diaper bag (Value: $65)
57B
Handmade baby blanket (Value: $45)
58
Large baby basket - Assorted items: diapers, onesies, stuffed Winnie the pooh, etc. (Value: $100)
59
7 pc cordial set and 8 pc vodka set glasses (Value: $30)
60
Large Chinese food "basket" wok, dishes, food, etc (Value: $125)
61
Large Italian "basket": kitchen gadgets, food, placemats (Value: $100)
62
Gluten Free bowl of baking goodies (Value: $75)
63
Bath basket: body products, candle (Value: $75)
64
Fishing basket: pole, supplies, food, décor (Value: $125)
65
Tea "basket": pot, tea (Value: $100)
66
Peacock velveteen shawl (Value: $50)
67
Freshwater pearl bracelet, Beijing China (Value: $125)
68
Austrian Crystal bracelet and earrings (Value: 55)
69
Vintage costume jewelry (Value: $35)
70
Maui Divers 14k gold & diamond dolphin necklace (Value: $450)
71
Stained Glass 13"x36"sunflowers (Value: $75)
72
1 hour massage, CMT/NMT - Professional Magic Massage (Value: $25)
73
Grey Fox Vineyard wine basket (Value: $45)
44
Eddie Bauer double bottle wine cooler (Value: $50)
74
3 month family membership to Fit One (Value: $300)
75
3 month family membership to Fit One (Value: $300)
76
Clean King by D Gift Certificate for carpet cleaning (Value: $80)
77
Sunset Cruise with Dinner for 4 (Forebay or Lake Oroville on 21' Sea Ray) (Value:$300)
78
Collector Doll -Ashton Drake Galleries (Value: $100)
79
Skil 3/8" Electric Drill (Value: $25)
80
Floor Jack, creeper, jack stands, wheel chocks (Value: $160)
81
Bird House - handmade (Value: $45)
82
1 year membership plus 1 session of gymnastic glasses at Athletic Horizons, Chico (Value: $76)
83A
2 pencil drawings by Brian Estes (Police Units) (Value: $30)
83B
2 pencil drawings by Brian Estes (Fire Units) (Value: $30)
83C
2 pencil drawings by Brian Estes (Air Units) (Value: $30)
84
Stainless steel bottle, 18 oz (Value: $18)
85
Stainless steel bottle, 18 oz (Value: $18)
86
Earring/necklace set from 5th Street Clothing Company, Chico (Value: $50)
87
Purple bag with ladies toiletries, earrings, candle, gift cert. from Artifax, Chico (Value: $55)
88
Black and Decker hand mixer (Value: $55)
89
Large metal planter with floral arrangement, apple candle, oil canvas, etc. from The Address, Chico (Value: $95)
90
Gift Certificate - Food at Old Root Beer Chico CA (Value: $10)
91
Gift Certificate - Golf for a foursome with carts (Canyon Oaks Country Club, Chico CA) (Value: $220)
92
Gift Certificate - Custom Framing (Art Etc. Chico CA) (Value: $30)
93
Gift Certificate - Two Free Meals & $25 drink dollars (Madison Bear Garden, Chico CA) (Value: $45)
94
Gift Certificate - Haircut and Highlights, Chico (Che' Divina w/Alicia Woodcox) (Value: $85)
95
Gift Certificate - Haircut and Highlights, Chico (Che' Divina w/Dani Banks) (Value: $85)
96
Gift Certificate - Haircut and Highlights, Chico (Che' Divina w/Soleena Storne) (Value: $85)
97
Trek Classic Cruiser bike (Campus Bikes, Chico CA) (Value: $345)
98
Handmade wood burl clock with Butte County Sheriff Logo (Value: $60)
99
Black Hill Gold earrings, post style (Value: $200)
100
Silver colored bangle bracelet watch (Value: $40)
101
Gift Certificate - Pampered Chef Products (Value: $100)
102
Plastic rolling tool box with tools (Value: $75)
103
Black Hills Gold ring set (Value: $934)
104
Black Hills Gold - man's band (Value: $274)
105
Small black wooden garden table (Value: $40)
106
Star Trek Movies VHS (Value: $35)
107
Coors Lights (2 hanging/ 2wall sconces) (Value: $20)
108
Beer Dispenser (Kegerator) (Value: $100)
109
Rag Quilt (lap size) fishing theme (Value: $45)
110
Gift Certificate for portrait (sitting fee&portraits) from Creative Imaging, Oroville (Value: $250)
111
$50 Gift Certificate for Applebee's, baseball type hat, & hot shooter paddles with balls (Value: $80)
112
Gift Certificate - Skyway Golf Park (Paradise CA) (2 lg buckets&2 rounds of golf) (Value: $24)
113
Pottery Vase from Don the Jeweler (Paradise CA) (Value: Unk)
114
Gift Certificate for portraits at Alain Tomatis Photography, Paradise (Value: $150)
115
Fly fishing rod, case and video (Value: $150)
116
Fly's and other fishing gear ($60)
117
FlightCare Membership Program family (Value: $45)
118
FlightCare Membership Program family (Value: $45)
119
3 men's haircuts at Jersey Clips & Brews (Value: $60)
120
Orient & Flume Vase (Value: $400)
121
Orient & Flume apple (Value: $90)
122
Orient & Flume apple (Value: $90

A few more updates...

I have gotten alot of e-mails asking about the auction and I have requested a list that I can post to the blog. I will try to get that up by Monday. I went out to the triathlon site today, it is going to be great, but certainly a challenge for me. A good one though. He will be proud I know. No guts no glory he always says. I watched our friends practice the swimming leg this morning, way to go H,A,G &S!!!! I told him all about it today, he watches me, seems to be interested. He seems to be very stable right now. He is more relaxed this weekend than he was earlier in the week, this is a good thing. He has progressed from eating popcicles to eating a little applesauce. It is also a good thing.

The girls came back for a visit today. H has been bringing home her drawings from school and telling me each day they are for her daddy. We kept them all in a little pile to bring to him. She reminded me yesterday that she was going to see him today, as if I forgot. They came today after I got him up and ready. We were waiting in the park for our babies to arrive. We had it to ourselves before they got there. I told him all about their week at school and how much they need and love him. I have watched them these past few weeks, and seen how much he is missed. Especially with H. I have watched her with our friends (dad's themselves) and seen how she craves that special teasing. I have seen her stand and watch as another child calls out "Dad" and runs into her father's arms. I sense the longing in her. I know it is there. I ache for her. I tell him all these things as we sit and wait for them to come. I tell him how much she loves him, and how much she needs her dad. She is herself when they arrive. He has little presents tucked under his arms for them when they get there. They are thrilled and sit at the picnic table to play with them. Their chatter is infectious and so wonderful to listen to. H suddenly tells me she wishes to sit on his lap. She climbs up and rests her head on my favorite place. I know that place so well. Know how it smells and how it feels under my cheek. I know how safe I feel when I am there. I watch her rest there, and see his head tilt towards her, as if to be closer. It is a quiet moment. A tender moment.

A couple of quick updates...

The BBQ is next Wednesday and they e-mailed me about the silent auction today. There are over 100 items in the auction. Unbelievable. Truly. Thank you. They are planning to end the auction promptly at 1:30pm, and are accepting phone bids. For information please call: Jane Malloy (538-7811), Becky Callas (538-2861) or Susan Tiffany (538-7543). Thank you all for your hard work. We appreciate it. I know he does also.

The triathlon is coming up! We have several teams signed up and some brave solo players. I know I did my "training" (walking) today, and plan to get some in every day until the big day. Of course I will be pushing a stroller and "walking" the run part of the race. I am so excited that N is my team biker and she has been getting some practice in herself. Her entire family has joined in as well, making up another team. Our team swimmer is MA. I have to brag a little for her and say that she just swam in the sharkfest at Alcatraz last weekend, and finished in the top 10% overall and in the top tier of women competing. He wanted to do that swim with her this year. Instead she swam under his number for him "80". Way to go MA. I know he is proud. I know we are proud. I know that I am glad she is on my team!

Today was E's first day of preschool. She was so excited. She dressed in her brand new "Dora" outfit, and backpack. She was the first one up this morning, the first one dressed. She could not wait. She spent all last year visiting the classroom when it was time to drop off or pick up H, and she knew where everything was. After we walked H to kindergarten, we went to wait for her class to start. She ran around the play yard while we waited, telling me that this was "her school now, NOT Heehee's. When the doors opened, she found her cubby and knew exactly where she wanted to go and what she wanted to play with. She all but ignored me. I asked for a kiss good-bye and she planted one on me, then turned away. I told her I would see her soon, she tossed a half hearted "bye" over her shoulder and went back to her business. My baby was ready. Ready to throw me over for a plastic castle and a Dora doll. Another sign of their resilience and Independence. I am proud of them.

Unwritten...

Someone recently gave me a CD of music. This one was for me, not for him. I put it in the truck, thinking that I would listen to it soon, but often when I am driving my thoughts wander and I do not even remember to turn on music. This week I remembered. When I was alone in the truck driving around, I put on the CD. Many of the songs were songs I was familiar with, some even songs that I quoted from on the blog. There were also a few that I had never heard of. It is amazing how music can have such a profound affect on you. I cried as I listened to it. I pulled over and listened to the songs, one right after another, all of them tugging at some primitive part of my being. I cried for what I am missing, I cried for what he is missing and mostly I cried for what they are missing. A split second and lives irrevocably changed. I let myself feel the anger at it, the frustration and the agony. Then another song came on, one that I had not heard, and probably would not have heard was it not on this CD. It was in the middle of the song when I heard the words:

Feel the rain on your skin
No one else can feel it for you
Only you can let it in
No one else, no one else
Can speak the words on your lips
Drench yourself in words unspoken
Live your life with arms wide open
Today is where your book begins
The rest is still unwritten

How true. His story has not been written, our story has not been written. We have to turn another page each day to see what it will bring. We might have clues along the way, but we will not know for sure until the last page has been turned. I am holding out for a happy ending.